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The Results Are In

Disclaimer: This is intended for entertainment purposes only and in no way is intended to influence voting either way.

CNN

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I might be crazy

I consider myself typical with only a few quirks. The other day I made it to class early and got my preferred front row by the wall seat. Since this is next to the wall I usually make use of the fold up surface of the seat next to me, so I can face the speaker and take notes comfortably. In the back of my mind I remembered the last time I had this seat, the usual late comers came in wanting the nearest seat possible to avoid being OBVIOUSLY late. Tardy people for this class is more frowned upon, because it is a lecture series in which each week there is a different guest speaker talking about the research they are involved in at there university. The speaker began, down went the lights. In came one of the chronic time offenders, he sat 2 seats away. A few moments later another repeat offender entered. Seeing my comfortable set up, my soda on the seat next to me and and an empty row of seats behind, he thought it a good idea to ask if he could have the seat next to me. Being passive-aggressive I gave him the seat, moving my soda, my textbook, my notebook over to my fold up so I could not fully face the speaker and get a kink in my neck. Not sure if he thought this was gracious, but I hope he picked up on my discontent. At this point I was so irritated, I decided not to take notes on this presentation, as I could not stay focused on anything more than the selfish, rude, late-comer.

To further fuel my embers, later in the presentation the gentleman two down began a backward bobbing of the head, unable to remain coherent. Remember, we were in the front row. After ten or so minutes of paying attention to nothing but the bobbing, I had returned to listening to the speaker when I heard snoring!! Thank goodness for his sake this was a single event, if it happened again I was gonna reach around and whap him on the head.

It couldn't have gotten any worse, but it did. To top off a great talk that I could have written a paper on, but could not, as note taking I did not partake; wafting my way came the reek of a silent emitter. I blamed this on the guy next to me since he took notice when I covered my nose with my sleeve. Next time I'll sit at least one row back, I will forever give up my front row wallflower seat.

Bad to the bone

Back in high school I worked at a convention center. Over the four years I worked there I passively took part in many an event for free. One of them was a Chippendales dancer show. Kind of exciting for a high school girl. I remember vividly a solo routine involving a Harley Motorcycle, a muscle man with black leathers and not much of anything else. His show was performed to George Thorogood's, 'Bad to the Bone'. To this day, every time I hear a George Thorogood song I see the routine in my head once more. No need to go to another show and waste my money, eh?